Posts Tagged ‘Advice’

Long Distance Relationship Advice

Sunday, June 13th, 2010

Maintaining a healthy long distance relationship can be a challenge.  It takes two mature people who are able to communicate in order to make it work.  It will also take some sound long distance relationship advice, and that’s where I come in.

In this article I’ve outlined some of the things that you can do to make your relationship not only survive, but thrive.  I’ve also compiled a few of the most common problems couples face and how to avoid falling into the same traps in your relationship.

One of the first things you and your partner need to do to ensure the continued strength of your relationship is to make sure you are both on the same page.  Make sure you agree on whether or not you have an exclusive relationship. If one partner thinks it’s ok to date while you are apart and the other one is staying monogamous, the relationship is doomed from the start.

For the most part, a couple won’t even contemplate a monogamous long distance relationship unless both parties feel the relationship has the potential to be  a long term one.  There is no sense making this type of commitment unless you both feel that the other person might be ‘the one’.

Another thing you and your partner need to do is make sure you have good communication skills.  When you are far away from each other for extended periods of time, and you can’t have physical contact, you will have to rely solely on your communication skills to continue to build your relationship.

That is why long distance relationships, when they last, are some of the best relationships around.  The couple has to learn to communicate effectively to make it work, and they don’t get distracted by all the physical attraction. They are able to connect on a deeper level which can often lead to a more fulfilling relationship.

If you are an insecure person, though most people won’t admit it if they are, you should avoid getting involved in a long distance relationship.  Being in this type of relationship requires a great amount of trust, typically people who are insecure see a threat everywhere, even where there isn’t one.

If you and your partner are overly suspicious, not only will your relationship be a constant battle, it will also be unlikely to work.  No good relationship can be based on suspicion and insecurities.

You and your partner also need to be careful of the temptation to have a ‘fling’ with someone while away from your partner.  Unless you both agree in advance that some extracurricular activity is ok (and if that’s the case why bother pursuing a long distance relationship in the first place) than you should stay faithful to your partner.

If you want to maintain your long distance relationship you have to know ahead of time that it will be a challenge and you and your partner both have to be committed to making it work, but if you follow my  long distance relationship advice you and your partner have a real shot of having a great, long term loving relationship.

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Relationship Advice for Men – Look at Evolution to Find a Mate

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

What is the best relationship advice for men?  What should men know if they want a relationship to work for the long haul?

Probably the single biggest piece of relationship advice for men is to stop listening to what women say they want and start observing what women actually display that they want.

How do they display what they want?  It is as simple as observing what kind of men they choose.

Women say “I want a man who listens to me.”  They choose the man who dominates the conversation.  Women say, “I want a guy with a good sense of humor.”  They date the guy who has money.

Why do women say they want one thing but actually go out with a guy who is just the opposite?  The answer to that question lies in the subconscious motivators for getting together.  And, therein lies my relationship advice for men.

The historical, biological reason for men and women to get together is to propagate the species.  In other words, just because getting pregnant may be the last thing on her conscious mind, when she evaluates a man at the subconscious level, she’s still looking for a good papa for her children.

Is the good dad someone who listens to her?  No, it is someone who will provide for her children.  And, the person who can provide for her children is someone who has the confidence to bring home the bacon.

Women need men who can be good providers.  While a man can produce thousands of sperm on repeated occasions throughout their adult lives, even into their 90’s, women have about 400 chances of producing a baby.  As a result, they are looking for a man who can provide longevity and stability for their babies.

A man who tells a women he is a lawyer and not a paralegal will have a better chance of landing her.  That is because she perceives that a lawyer is a better provider for her future children.

But having a good income is not enough.  A woman needs to perceive that a man is generous with his resources and will provide for her children.  That is why women place such a high value on gifts such as jewelry.

It may also be why the engagement ring must be such a large purchase.  When you ask a woman to marry you, you give her a ring, not just because it is traditional and romantic, but because it is a tangible display that you can provide for her and her children.

Further, even though modern humans make money more from their brains than their brawn, women are still programmed to think of strength equaling the ability to provide.  That’s why, even when there is evidence to the contrary in the form of a tax return, the woman is hardwired to choose the lineman over the computer geek.

So, the biggest piece of relationship advice for men is to figure out what women need from an evolutionary point of view and give it to her.

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Advice on Relationships – How to Keep a Woman Happy

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

Do you know how to keep a woman happy?  Here is some advice on relationships for men.

The first advice on relationships item I have for you is to always be yourself.  Many men don’t feel that they are good enough to catch a beautiful, sexy woman, so they put on a show.  But a confident man is the sexiest beast around.  Have you ever noticed that some of the ugliest guys have some of the prettiest women?  That is because they display a level of confidence that is more attractive to women than physical looks.

Next, you should do the little things.  This means offering to take her car in for an oil change or giving her a bag of Jelly Bellies (her favorite flavors) from time to time.  Sometimes men think in terms of “grand gestures,” when it is the little things add up to long relationships.

This ties into the next piece of advice on relationships: appreciate her.  You shouldn’t take her for granted.  Let her know that you value her.

Next up is not obviously looking at other women when you are with her.  Women think that you are comparing her to the woman you’re looking at.  They don’t understand the whole concept of “the day I stop looking is the day I die.”  This comes from the biological drive for monogamy in women.  Women are looking for a lifetime partner for a man with whom they can raise children.  They can’t help it.  That’s how evolution designed them.  So minimize the ogling, especially when she’s around.

You should try to make her laugh.  While men list good looks at the top of the things they need in a woman, women list a man’s sense of humor.  So, if you want the relationship to last, keep her laughing.

The next bit of advice on relationships comes in seeking common interests.  It’s great if you got together because of a hobby or an interest, but it still helps when you take an interest in a long standing passion of hers.  If this means developing an appreciation for foreign films, so be it.  This shows that you care about her and she’ll know you are one in a million.

Once you get the girl, it may seem like you don’t have to try anymore – at least as far as grooming goes.  And, while women are less sensitive to looks than men are, they still like a man who makes an attempt.  So, shave on weekends.  Keep in touch with the latest fashion trends for men.  In short, don’t get sloppy just because you’ve landed her.  You can unland her just as easily.

She’s going to need to know that she can integrate you into her circle of family and friends.  A man must be part of her larger life, especially after the first few weeks of passion are over.  So, make an effort to get along with her girlfriends and impress her parents.  A woman relies on her social network to validate her relationship choices.  Make an effort.

You should always be considerate of her feelings.  Women are less stable than guys.  Part of this is hormonal.  When you are sensitive to her mood, you won’t get on her bad side.

The final piece of advice on relationships is to be open to trying new things.  At the beginning of a relationship, everything is new from the types of dates you arrange to the way you kiss.  But, after a while, these things become routine.  If you find that your relationship has fallen into a rut, shake things up.  Try something new.  It will go a long way to keeping your relationship healthy.

So, there are ten bits of advice on relationships to keep your dating life strong. Look you guys, these things are common sense and the fact is I almost drove my sweetheart out of my life because I didn’t pay attention to what I was doing. There is a book that woke me up written by T ‘Dub’ Jackson called “The Magic Of Making Up”. After I read it and began applying his common sense suggestions, our love life turned around. Not only that all of my personal relationships, with friends, co-workers and my family have become much smother than they were before.

You might want to check out “The Magic of Making Up” yourself.

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